I would be happy never to visit another doctor for the rest of my life. It’s just too frustrating.

But I realize such a dream is as likely as winning the lottery.

As a child, I saw doctors who made house calls, even at night. These physicians felt like part of the family.

They knew all our names. They knew the family medical history. Their kids went to school with us.

Too many doctors today, especially the ones who are affiliated with large hospital-owned practices, seem too rushed to know anyone.

A patient is just the next 10-minute time slot in room B down the hall.

Medical visits are so impersonal. Doctors look at their laptops instead of at their patients.

An eye doctor told me he once waved at his physician in the examining room and called out, “Yoohoo, I’m over here,” because his doctor never looked up from his computer during the brief office visit.

Most of the doctors my family and friends encounter never ask about the previous medical problem and whether the meds or treatments they prescribed worked.

Some doctors consider me a problem patient. Why? Because I ask a lot of questions.

Yet most guides to finding the right physician emphasize the importance of doing exactly that.

A patient should feel free to ask questions and discuss his or her medical condition without feeling hurried or bothersome.

That usually cannot happen when a physician is allowed just 10 minutes with each patient.

One practice I am familiar with never answers the phone, not even during office hours.

An answering machine takes all messages and staffers return calls to patients, maybe hours or days later, if at all.

Access is horrendous.

A request to this office for a copy of lab test results yielded nothing, not even two weeks later.

Another practice urges patients who develop a health problem and need an appointment that day or the next to go to an emergency-care center.

Apparently that physician group can schedule patient appointments only months in advance.

It’s too bad a patient can’t plan his bronchitis or skin rash that far ahead.

Like any relationship, a doctor and patient must have good rapport in order to make the partnership work. But how does a patient know how well he and a physician will “click” until that first visit?

By then it may be too late.

Two friends recently tried to switch doctors within their health network and were told they had to stay with Dr. X because that’s whom they saw in the past.

“But I didn’t care for him and want another doctor,” one patient protested.

Too bad. She could not see another doctor in the neurology group, she was told.

The patient switched to a different hospital network in order to get another physician.

When it comes to many medical problems, every doctor seems to have a different opinion. So it is important to find a physician we can feel comfortable with and trust to give us the best care.

Navigating our complex healthcare system can be confusing and frustrating. To maximize the benefits we get from our medical visits, we should follow a few basic steps.

First, jot down questions before calling or visiting the doctor. That way, nothing will be forgotten.

If the doctor resists and is too impatient to take questions, he or she is the wrong one, at least for me.

Bring along a current list of all meds and supplements and their dosages.

It may be helpful to make a list of symptoms and when they occur, so the doc can look for possible patterns.

Take notes on the diagnosis and treatment options and side effects, or have a companion jot down what the physician says.

Some folks record the doctor’s instructions, to eliminate any confusion later. Ask first before recording.

Tell the doctor about any related health research conducted on the Web. Some physicians discourage patients from researching their conditions.

Others want to be part of the process and guide their patients to more reliable sites and peer-reviewed advice.

Education helps patients become active members of their healthcare team and reduces the chances of medical errors. Knowledge is empowering.

We need to take control of our health. At stake are our bodies and even our lives.