Log In


Reset Password
LEHIGH VALLEY WEATHER

Not your child? Yes, your child!

Getting people to participate in something preventive is a challenge, and it is difficult to measure outcomes. After all, there is no way to measure what never happens. Thankfully, scientific research has been able to tell us what might happen if certain things are not present in a young person's life. And conversely, we can be sure that when high-quality prevention programs are delivered as the author prescribes, the positive outcomes shown in the research will come to fruition.

I often find myself engaged in conversations with parents at events like open houses, parent-teacher conferences or family fun nights when I am present to promote universal prevention education. As they look at the display board and peruse samples of activities from programs, I hear comments like, "This would be great for my neighbor's kids" or "I know someone who could really use this program." When I reply that these programs are good for all kids, I often get told, "Oh, not my kids. They are so good. They will never, ever do drugs. They tell me that smoking is bad and drinking is dangerous. I trust them."

Yet, studies show that there is a great disparity between the number of youth who report that they drink and the number of parents who believe that their child is drinking. Many parents are either unaware or in denial that their children are dabbling in illegal substances.

All kids are essentially good kids, and all kids are at-risk kids. The mere environment in which we live – a digital society with the world at our children's fingertips, busy families, heavy competition in everything from sports to academics – is enough to increase the chances that kids will make some bad choices along the way. The job of parents is not to isolate their children, but rather to give them tools for dealing with the temptations and distractions out there.

Which is why universal prevention is so important. While it will not prevent every possible misbehavior, bad decision or misstep, it does help parents to set clear boundaries for their emerging teenager. For teens, it helps them set goals and think about the choices they make. Balancing love and limits is what raising a teen is all about. Becoming more social, spreading one's wings and taking some risks are what being a teen is all about.

To say "not my child" is to somehow deny that your child is a normally developing adolescent. My response is simple: "Yes. Your child and my child." They will all face situations where they must make choices. They will all have to look peer pressure in the eye at some point. Why not give them the tools they need to keep themselves safe?

Compare it to driving a car. We don't just give 16-year-olds a license. We make them study, take driving lessons, practice and eventually pass a test. We wouldn't dream of tossing them the car keys without having first provided some education on driving skills and laws. Yet as parents we often stand at the threshold of adolescence, looking adoringly at our sweet, compliant children and say "not my child" when the topic is drugs and alcohol.

The reality is yes, your child. Get prepared, get educated. Take advantage of programs such as Strengthening Families Program 10-14 (SFP) that is offered at Whitehall-Coplay Middle School and many other middle schools in the Lehigh Valley. Find out what your school is doing in prevention education and get involved. Your child's life may depend on it.