I believe at around my youngest’s age, 11, going on 12, they are allowed a little autonomy. Within reason. No, sorry, you cannot choose your own bedtime.

Recently, we attended a meeting at his school. There were a lot of students, parents and teachers in attendance. As the meeting ended, he mentioned one of his teachers was there. I have not yet met her, though we have communicated by email. I said, “Oh, good, you can introduce us.”

My son said “No.”

I had a split second to decide how to respond. I decided this was a good autonomy time. So I said, “OK, that’s fine.”

We have parent teacher conferences and other school activities when I can meet his teachers. As much as I was curious, it wasn’t a big deal.

My son is at the age where certain things are important: what he eats; bedtime; bathing regularly; and using deodorant. Keeping up with his schoolwork. We discuss that frequently.

Everything else is optional.

He has told me that I am a “helicopter parent.” I am trying to let that one go.

He has also said I am always working. That isn’t true, but it is his perception, and I have to appreciate that.

Parenting, particularly single parenting, is tough. So sometimes you have to let go of a little thing or two, to keep the peace.