Log In

Reset Password

Respectfully Yours: How to snub a snob cordially and calmly

Dear Jacquelyn,

This past year I moved and made several new friends in the area. I’m enjoying these new friendships. However, one person in particular comes across as a snob and I feel like I don’t meet their so-called standards. How can I politely handle a snob?

Dear Reader,

Snobs are everywhere, in the suburbs, at work, and in school.

You can often recognize them by the fact they think everyone else is beneath them. This mindset is that of entitlement, and stuck-up individuals are extremely good at making others feel uncomfortable.

Because you have fine-tuned social graces and the strength of character to respond politely, it’s unlikely that you will call out this new acquaintance for any infractions. I suggest when circumstances force you to be in his or her company, you either ignore the person, avoid certain topics, or change the subject.

When someone is a snob, they work hard to make the people around them feel less than them. You probably listen intently to the conversations that typically revolve around outside factors that are used to define one rather than core values. When you are in the midst of the encounter, be mindful of your own behavior.

Don’t engage in the “I’m better than you” game. You don’t need to prove that you are a better person than the other person is. You should remain polite and not respond to any attempts to impress you.

Most people’s natural tendency is to surround themselves with others who share similar lives and values. As social situations may have it, we all at some point end up on the receiving end of a snobbish mouth. Dealing with people who display their entitlement is frustrating and difficult. In some scenarios, it’s wisest to distance yourself and avoid any unnecessary interactions.

It’s important to understand that snobs feed their desire to feel superior by engaging with an attentive admiring audience. Next time you have a snob encounter, don’t feel obligated to engage. As always, remain cordial, calm and collected.

Respectfully Yours,


Have a question? Email: jacquelyn@ptd.net. Jacquelyn Youst is owner of the Pennsylvania Academy of Protocol, specializing in etiquette training. She is on the board of directors of the National Civility Foundation.

All Rights Reserved &Copy; 2020 Jacquelyn Youst